Raven blinked as he stared at the assembled entirety of Hogwarts students and half the staff standing in the Great Hall as he stood on a raised platform in front of them all.
He honestly just wanted to nap, but here he was teaching everyone how to actually duel, because why the fuck not.
Honestly, he was only here because Albus had bribed him. What did the old man use to bribe someone who could create anything and get anything he ever wanted with ease?
(Flashback time!)
Raven stared at Albus with a raised eyebrow.
"You want me, I repeate, me, to teach everyone of the students in this school actual proper dueling because that shit stain Lockhart didn't actually teach anyone anything except how to be a fool?" Raven asked and Albus nodded pleased.
"Yes, exactly that."
"Why should I? What do I get out of it?" Raven asked as he didn't want to teach all those brats, he was already teaching five people proper real life dueling, and now he had to teach all of Hogwarts, that was a lot of work for our person who's got a very busy schedule.
"Pride in teaching the next generation of wizards and witches?"
"I'm already teaching a few personally, and I teach some of the classes as it is."
"Money?"
"I'm richer then you ever could be. I can literally break the economy in mere moments."
"High quality materials?" Albus said after a couple minutes of silence.
"What type of materials are we talking about?" Now he was curious.
"For one, Phoenix feathers, Phoenix ash, three vials of Phoenix tears and a single small vial of Phoenix blood, all willingly given. Plus a book written by me on dragons and the use of their blood, updated just two weeks ago." Raven stiffened at the juicy carrot dangling in front of him.
"I'll even throw in some elder dragon scales." The carrot turned golden. Raven snatched it up.
"Deal, but I expect everything before I even have to start those lessons."
"I'll have them ready by tomorrow at noon." Albus promised with a pleased smile.
Raven nodded and moved to leave, but he paused and turned to Albus as he reached the door to the stairs out the office.
"By the way, I know you're playing me, but it's amusing to see you try and trick me into thinking this wasn't all planned." Raven smirked at the man who laughed joyfully as Raven left the room.
(End flashback)
"Oh yeah, that's how." He mumbled to himself before he stood up all the way and clapped his hands a single time to get everyone's attention on him fully. No magic, just a strong single clap.
"Welcome everyone to Dueling 101 by a proper actual duelist." Raven declared sternly.
"Those of you who aren't little first years might remember that failure of a being, Gilderoy Lockhart, if for some reason you remember anything besides our dear Professor Snape and myself proving points, forget it then." Raven declared firmly as everyone who was a second year to seventh year to nod.
"Now, first and foremost, I have recruited the professor you see here to assist me, because I've sadly not figured out a way to exist in multiple places, yet." Raven declared as everyone started sweating imagining multiple of him, especially the older years.
"Now, first and foremost, stance. When dueling you must take up a proper stance. Angle yourself, most spells that require direct contact are simple enough to lean out of the way." Raven declared simply as he created an illusion of a person dodging spells using a propert stance, occasionally shielding.
"You should dodge lightly rather then waste energy on shields."
"Now, which two students would like to demonstrate up here? Don't worry, you won't be accused of being the heir of Slytherin." Raven didn't feel bad about taking that pot shot. He felt satisfaction at seeing the second years and up shifting around.
"If there is no volunteers, I guess I'll have to pick." Raven decided and flicked his hand as a Hufflepuff, some vampire movie looking dude and a random Slytherin girl were floated to the stage.
"Assume the stance. I and Professor Flitwick will be coaching you through this exercise." Raven said as he moved behind the Slytherin girl as her coach with the tiny Professor doing the same for the Hufflepuff.
•~~~~•
"That is how a proper duel looks in a ring, maybe one day you can see what a real duel for your life looks like in safe conditions. For now though, you're all dismissed." Raven declared trying to hide the mental exhaustion from this lesson, because why we're over half of them dunderheads who couldn't take a proper stance or hold their wand straight?
"You are one hundred percent right, they're all almost entirely dunderheads." Raven said to Snape who merely had that expected told you so look.
•~~~~•
Raven let a small cackle out as he held the homunculus body and laid it down, ok, it wasn't a proper homunculus, but it was something made of stone and metal.
Crafting false bodies with acceptable quality was actually a bit difficult.
"Oh well, Aria start scanning body for any deformations once false soul is inserted." Raven said as he looked at the slightly large crow that was perched ontop of his shoulder.
"Understood. Beginning pre trial scan. Complete." A femine, but robotic, voice spoke out from the crow.
"Good. Beginning insertion of false soul." Raven said as he lowered his hand as the floating white orb sunk into the homunculus body, Raven had already raised a shield around himself and Aria.
"Test 001," the body exploded into pieces, "failure." Raven declared with a smile.
"Results?" Raven asked the artificial bird.
"False soul attempted to bond with the homunculus, however it soon rejected the form after incompatible form was realized and false soul began breaking apart." Aria declared.
"I see, log into the notes for Test 001, just because the soul believes it is the right shape, doesn't mean it will conform or be able to properly align into the body. Souls will implode on themselves if so."
"Logged."
"Alright, Test 002, using runes to try and trick body into believing it is the same form as the soul." Raven said as he began carving a new set of runes into a new homunculus body.
Easy work when he could just vanish remains and Ammon a new body immediately.
A lot more explosions and failures happened.
•~~~~•~~~~•~~~~•
Mwahahahahaha, no lemon.
Also happy Father's Day for any fathers who might read this story.
A much shorter chapter, but this one was most filler to showcase how Raven spends his time when he isn't teaching or learning. How his focus is.
Plus how to bribe him.
Anyways, ima go work on the next chapter which brings in a lot of amusement to me thinking on how I'm writing it, or rather going to be writing it according to my notes for the chapter.
Till next time!
-Voidy, The Insomniac Writer