Kakashi clasped his hands together quietly. "Alright, focus up, Team 7. Strategy time.
Pigs are unpredictable. If we rush in, they'll scatter."
Naruto raised an eyebrow. "So… how exactly are we supposed to catch them?"
"We force them back toward the ranch," Kakashi replied smoothly. "We'll narrow their escape routes as we chase them. Controlled herding."
He stepped forward, gaze scanning the lazy horde of pigs in the field.
"Here's the breakdown: Sasuke, you'll circle from the right. Sakura, take the wide left. Keep them moving in one direction—boxed in."
Naruto tilted his head. "What about me?"
"Ah, Naruto…" Kakashi gave him a single, unbothered glance. "You'll be the bait."
Naruto blinked. "Wait—what?"
"Bait." Kakashi repeated, already vanishing into the bushes like a phantom.
"Bonus tip," his voice drifted back from the trees. "That huge pig over there with the X-shaped scar on its belly? That's their leader."
Naruto followed his finger—and nearly choked.
Standing among the herd was a massive pig, almost twice the size of the others.
Thick muscles, dirt-caked hooves, and an expression that screamed I don't run—I charge.
It stared back at Naruto. This gaze made Naruto Shiver unconsciously.
Naruto massaged his temples. "So... I just have to lead the herd toward ranch without dying. Easy."
but he was sweating profusely thinking the situation he was about to fall in.
While Naruto was lamenting his role.
Sasuke and Sakura quietly moved into position on either side of the field, hidden by bush.
Once they gave the signal, it was Naruto's turn to shine.
Naruto stepped into the field, rope belt swaying, straw hat drooping over his eyes like a makeshift cowboy ninja.
"Let's do this," he whispered, creeping toward the herd.
To his surprise, nothing happened.
The pigs didn't even blink.
They didn't run. They didn't charge. They just… stood there. A few snorted lazily, too focused on chewing grass to even acknowledge him.
Naruto cautiously stepped right into their group.
Still nothing.
Despite standing right in the middle of the herd, Naruto noticed something strange.
Nothing was happening.
The pigs just kept grazing, oinking lazily, tails flicking in the breeze. They didn't run. They didn't chase. They didn't even notice him.
Naruto frowned.
"Huh? Aren't pigs supposed to, like, stampede or squeal or something? I thought they'd freak out the second I stepped in here!"
Trying to stir them up, he waved his arms and made loud noises. Nothing.
He poked one with his finger.
Still nothing.
He climbed on one like a rodeo champion, hoping it would buck him off.
The pig gave a disinterested grunt and kept chewing.
"…Seriously?"
"If they won't even look at me, how am I supposed to herd them anywhere?" he muttered. "At this rate, it'll take all day just to move one—let alone the whole group."
But then—his eyes slid to the leader. A massive, X-scarred brute, standing proudly in the center of the field.
Thick, wide, and calm, like an old war general who'd survived ten feeding troughs and seen it all.
Naruto narrowed his eyes. "If I can make him angry, the whole group might follow."
Meanwhile, inside the Boss Pig's Mind…
Another day, another peaceful breakfast. The sun is warm, the mud is soft, and the grass is particularly tender today, the boss pig thought to himself, chewing slowly with the contentment of a creature who feared nothing.
He spotted Naruto the moment he entered the field. Another brat , He flicked an ear lazily. Let him walk around. He'll get bored and leave.
Just don't mess with my food, little Brat.
Naruto crept closer to the boss pig and watched.
The boss pig barely reacted.
No snorting. No stomping. Just stood there, chewing grass like the rest.
"Even the boss is just… ignoring me?" Naruto whispered. "Isn't he supposed to be the scary one?"
But then a thought hit him—hard.
"Wait a sec. If I can piss off the boss pig, maybe the rest will follow him! Just like a pack following their leader..."
His lips slowly curled into a mischievous grin. A Wicked idea sparked.
"Hehehehehehehehe…"
The boss pig's ear twitched. He felt a chill down his spine but kept chewing. That laugh… sounded illegal.
Kakashi, watching from the trees, tilted his head curiously. What's he up to now…?
Naruto created a shadow clone with a quiet poof, then casually walked away from the group.
The clone remained in position, watching the pigs silently.
Then—serious eyes. Tight focus. Determined fingers forming the tiger seal.
He crouched low behind the massive rear of the boss pig.
And shouted—
"Leaf Village Secret Finger Jutsu: One Thousand Years of Death!"
P O K E.
Hmm. That brat's been quiet. Good. He probably left—
!!!
WHAT IS THAT?!
The boss pig's eyes shot open so wide they practically popped out. His entire body went stiff. Grass fell from his mouth.
He felt… violated.
Spiritually violated.
He released a scream so loud and broken it didn't even sound pig-like—it was existential.
Back in the field, Naruto winced.
Even from a distance, he could hear the boss pig's scream echo across the hills—like a ghost being exorcised from its body.
Kakashi, watching calmly from the tree line, blinked once.
Yep. That'll do it.
The pigs scattered like fireworks.
The boss pig turned slowly, trembling with rage. Its eyes, wide and bloodshot, locked onto Naruto's clone.
The clone smirked—then vanished in a puff of smoke.
A moment of silence.
Then the boss pig's furious gaze landed on the real Naruto—wide-eyed, frozen in place, sweat trailing down his temple.
The pig snorted, loud and sharp.
Naruto took a slow step back. "Oh no… did I overdo it?" he muttered, voice cracking.
His heart skipped a beat as the massive beast pawed at the ground, muscles twitching.
Then—
The pig charged.
"OH NO!"
Naruto turned and ran for his life.
Behind him, the boss pig let out a war cry—half squeal, half demonic roar—and the entire herd followed like an army answering its general's call.
The ground trembled with their stampede. Dirt flew. Trees shook.
Naruto's back was drenched in sweat just from imagining the horde behind him.
But he didn't dare look back.