Just as the guard was about to leave, he suddenly heard something rattle behind him. Turning back, the cell was quiet as ever, but he could feel as though something was amiss.
Trying to take a closer look, the guard opened the gate walking in. His hand was on the hilt of his sword and he took a prepared stance.
Seconds passed, but even after proper checking he couldn't find the source of noise.
"Must be a rat." He muttered under his breath, sighing as he turned around to walk out—but just then something coiled around his neck, pulling him back in.
The grip was strong, like the vice of a python. The chains rattled again as the guard quickly realised that he was in a leg lock position and the one choking him was none other than the very conscious, completely sane otherworlder.
The guard's mind was clouded by a sea of panic as he flailed around, unable to realise 5he choke hold. In a frenzied state he scratched Te-Ho's legs, hit them with his elbows and even tried to bite but ultimately everything was useless. He couldn't even scream as his lungs had no air left in them.
Soon the guard stopped flailing and slumped to the ground.
"Mother fuc—" Te-Ho cursed under his breath as fresh blood gushed out of his scratched up thigh.
Without wasting much time, he quickly got to work, using his feet to check the body of the guard for the keys to his cuffed up wrists—soon he found them and escaped his binds.
His arms that had been chained to the ceiling for so long finally drooped back down, having lost all their blood, they were pale as snow, and twitched from time to time—but luckily Te-Ho could still use them like normal.
'Must be the systems doing.' Te-Ho thought pumping his fist. 'Ugh—I don't even wanna think about what would have happened without the system.' Te-Ho shuddered as he felt his spine turn cold.
Quickly changing his mood, he stole the guards clothes and sword, finally feeling warm again after ages. Sneaking out of the cell, he pretended to be as confident as possible to disguise himself as the guard, finally reaching the exit of the underground dungeon.
At the exit, there was a single post with a young lad sitting there in a daze. Te-Ho slowed down his stride, lowered his head and slammed at the desk as if it were a natural thing to do.
The young guard shook in surprise, before looking at the person who made the sound—before he could form a connection, the black haired, well built and tall Te-Ho spoke in a deep voice. "I am going out for some fresh air."
The young man nodded, still lost in a trance—it was only when Te-Ho had moved a considerable distance when he realised that his partner had golden, brown hair and was close to his own height.
As soon as he remembered this fact, the young man sprang out, his sword drawn. But alas the pretender form before was long gone, blended into the forest like a tree.
Te-Ho on the other hand, ran for his life as if being chased by dogs. A few minutes later, drenched in sweat he hastily threw off the heavy metal armour he was wearing, landing on the ground in exhaustion.
[I still can't believe that worked.] the angelic voice spoke and the systems blue glare surfaced.
"What do you mean? Didn't you agree with it too?" Te-Ho spoke in between pants, struggling to catch his breath.
[I thought you were planning on killing one, taking off your binds and then killing the others.] the angelic voice offered indifferently.
Te-Ho's eyes sharpened as he glared at the system. "I learnt a bit of martial arts from a previous fuck buddy of mine but I'm not capable of using a whole ass sword—plus those things are way heavier than what they show in movies."
After making his point Te-Ho finally stood up and continued to walk through the forest in a random direction.
"So what's the plan now?"
[Hmm… let's see, we managed to escape for now but I am sure they'll start looking for you in every town. You will need to gain the strength to fight too—so I guess we can find a town, get some supplies and try to cross the border to a different country.]
"And what about money?"
[To steal is pretty much our only option. No wait—given how you are you, and that heavily 'gift' of yours we might as well proved 'services' to those rich, peculiar women.]
Te-Ho shuddered at the prospect, scenes of the atrocities he had gone through flashed before his eyes as he immediately rejected it. 'I need to purify my soul with some good looking MILF's before I get on it with others.'
[Hey beggars can't be choosers now] The system spoke.
Te-Ho squinted, looking at the system. "I swear we need to set some boundaries for this mind reading business."
***
Hours had passed, the sun had almost completely settled and Te-Ho was officially lost.
Treading through the forest, surrounded by nothing but leaves and bushes. "AGH—Where even am I?" Te-Ho screamed in anger.
[The answer is simple young one. It's because you are stupid enough not even think about the direction you were walking in.] the angelic voice resounded in Te-Ho's mind.
"Huh, I'M THE STUPID ONE? Do you think I was in a situation to simoly ask for a map?" Te-Ho shot back, clenching his fingers in anger.
[Should have done that when you first came here, but alas you were too busy fucking the crazy noble.]
"Ah—Yes my bad for not having the insight that the first person I meet is a crazy bitch and that this world is rather fucked up—"
"FOR GODS SAKE STOP SHOUTING!" A voice bellowed from above.
'Who?' Te-Ho thought, looking up in surprise.
At first he saw nothing, but then suddenly the leaves on the trees fluttered and form within them shot though a brown streak, effectively landing on the ground a few inches away from Te-Ho, kicking up a dust cloud.
'What the fuck?' Te-Ho staggered a few feet away in fear.
Only when the dust cleared up, did Te-Ho's dear die out. After all the one who was standing in front of him was a busty, dark skinned, silver haired woman with pointy elves.
'A dark elf?'