...
The night was thick, like a goddamn Snorlax's ass after ten tons of Berries. A silvery light illuminated the entire land, bringing a chilling cold even though it was early summer, goddammit! You'd think a summer night would be warm, but no, this place decided to be a frigid bastard. Probably some pissed-off Ice-type Pokémon screwing with the weather, the pricks.
A thin mist coiled from the trees, blurring the otherwise clear view like a car's rearview mirror after being pelted with mud by some mischievous kids. Or maybe like trying to see through a Smog attack from a Koffing.
Beneath the shadows of the forest, various pairs of red eyes glowed, all looking in the same direction. Those eyes were filled with rage, fury at their territory being invaded by some stinking humans. Honestly, who could blame them? Humans are always trashing the place, chasing their kids, and generally being a pain in the ass.
Mixed with the smell of earth, moss, and rotten wood, the ground was covered in winding tree roots and tangled rocks. Suddenly, a slim figure bolted through the forest like a Jolteon on crack. Its rapid breathing made one worry if it would collapse from exhaustion at any moment. Damn! If it passed out here, it'd probably become a free meal for Beedrill. And nobody wants to be Pokémon chow, unless you're into that kind of kinky shit.
Trailing right behind the slim figure, like a cockroach behind a Croagunk, was a burly guy in camouflage. His body was strapped with an ammo belt, loaded with bullets like a walking bakso vendor. This dude looked like he'd just stepped out of a goddamn Team Rocket recruitment video.
The man, holding two massive firearms, watched the slim figure move quickly through the forest, then abruptly stop. He knew his bulky physique wasn't suited for racing through the woods. Continuing the chase would only make him lose his target, and that could make him rage like a Primeape whose bananas were stolen. Or worse, like a trainer whose shiny Pokémon just ran away.
"This bastard, how dare he mess with me!" the man snarled, his voice like thunder in the dry season. He was probably thinking, "I just wanna catch some damn Pokémon, not play hide-and-seek with this little shit!"
The burly man immediately pulled the bolt of his rifle and, without hesitation, pulled the trigger. Bullets immediately scattered out, speeding towards the figure running ahead. The smell of gunpowder immediately spread like a Stunky's spray after a fart. The creatures that had been hiding in the darkness retreated further into their hideouts. The man's firepower was too brutal. They were no match for him, you son of a bitch! They were probably thinking, "Nope, not dealing with this human's bullshit. I'm out!"
The figure running ahead heard the horrifying gunshot and tree branches exploding around it. The shadow of death quickly enveloped it.
"Can't stop!"
Only that thought remained in its mind. It knew very well that if it stopped, the bullets behind it would turn it into a colander! A stupid way to die. Worse than getting one-shot by a Critical Hit from a Focus Punch.
"Click, click..."
Damn it! The magazine was empty. The man cursed, but he could only pull out the empty magazine and quickly reload. This was like trying to heal in the middle of a Gym battle, with no goddamn time to relax! What a load of crap.
Taking advantage of this golden opportunity, the slim figure immediately ran towards a nearby mud puddle. Upon reaching the mud puddle, the slim figure didn't stop. With a single splash, it dove straight into the mud, quickly covering its entire body. Disgusting, like having just soaked in a Quagsire's pond. Or like being covered in a fresh Sludge Bomb.
After that, it reluctantly pulled a bag from inside its clothes. As soon as the bag opened, a foul stench immediately assailed it. The smell? Like a mixture of Muk's poop and a week-old, unwashed Swalot's vomit. And maybe a dash of Exploud's bad breath. But the slim figure didn't care. It took the yellowish contents, mixed them with as much mud as possible, and smeared them on its face, hair, and body. Gross! This kid was literally turning into a walking hazard.
The burly man watched the slim figure's actions. Even though he didn't know what the strange kid was doing, he knew one thing: that person no longer had the strength to run!
"Run! Just keep running for me!"
Seeing this, the burly man grimaced. He slowly walked towards the slim figure, carrying his two weapons, saying, "You made a fuss just because I asked you to lure some Pokémon into a trap, and now you've even stolen my Poké Balls. You're looking for death, you know that?!" He probably needed that Poké Ball to catch a legendary, the greedy bastard.
The slim figure said nothing, just lay still in the mud, not even breathing, as if dead. Playing dead, huh? That's a weak Pokémon's ultimate move, isn't it? Like when a Zubat faints and you still can't escape the damn cave.
"Not talking?"
The burly man walked to the edge of the mud puddle, looked at the slim figure lying motionless in the mud, then asked with a hint of confusion.
But just as he was about to check if the kid had died, a dark shadow quickly zipped past, and a pair of giant pincers clamped onto the burly man.
"Damn it! A wild Pokémon dared to attack me!"
The sudden attack gave the burly man no time to bother with the slim figure in the mud. He suddenly raised both his weapons and fired bullets at the dark shadow.
"Clang, clang, clang..."
The dark shadow quickly swept its tail, which gleamed with a metallic sheen. All the bullets were deflected; not a single shot left a mark on that tail! Holy shit, what kind of Pokémon is this? Like Chrom steel. Or maybe it just had a maxed-out Defense stat, the lucky son of a bitch.
"Click!"
The magazine was empty again, damn it! And this time there was no time to reload. The dark shadow immediately hit the man, knocking him to the ground.
"NO!!!"
The burly man roared in fear, followed by the sound of gurgling water. Maybe he peed himself from fright, what a loser! Then came the sound of tearing flesh and a horrifying chewing sound. Ugh! You could practically hear the Pokémon's stomach growling, ready for a feast.
The slim figure lying in the mud heard these sounds and couldn't stop trembling, but it quickly suppressed its fear and panic. Its slightly trembling body gradually calmed down. Not because it had a mental fortitude as strong as an Onix, but because it knew very well that if it dared to reveal itself, the burly man's fate would be its future. Didn't want to become a wild Pokémon's meal, did it? Especially not like that, getting devoured by some pissed-off creature.
The tearing and chewing sounds gradually disappeared. Not long after, the slim figure could clearly feel a large body sitting next to it. A gust of wind blew towards it. The Pokémon lowered its head and began to sniff the smell on its body.
A foul smell? Of course! The Pokémon lifted its head, shook its head, clearly uncomfortable with the stench, and immediately lost interest in it. Maybe it thought, "Ugh, this human smells worse than a Grimer convention. I'm out!" With a flap of its wings, its figure quickly disappeared into the darkness of the night.
The danger had passed. The slim figure slightly raised its head, breathing cautiously. However, it knew very well that it didn't have much time left. It had to leave this forest as quickly as possible, or it would die here! A stupid death! Worse than getting stuck in a goddamn cave without an Escape Rope.
The slim figure immediately got up and crawled out of the mud pit. What greeted its eyes was a bloody corpse, but it didn't care about that. It rushed to the corpse and quickly rummaged through its pockets.
Soon, it retrieved a few items, and an expression of joy appeared on its face. Like a kid getting cotton candy. It quickly put the items into its pocket, then the slim figure determined a direction, quickened its pace, and immediately left the area.
Not long after the figure disappeared, several Victreebel, accompanied by some Weepinbell and Bellsprout, arrived at the corpse. The Victreebel swung its slender vines, quickly injecting them into the corpse. Digestive fluids rapidly decomposed the body, and soon the corpse turned into a puddle of slime. Damn, Predator the Pokémon version! They cleaned up the mess faster than a Chansey healing a critically injured Pokémon.
Seeing this, the Bellsprout and Weepinbell behind the Victreebel immediately swarmed forward. When this group of Pokémon dispersed, not a single trace of blood was found on the ground. Clean as if it had just been washed. They probably left behind some good fertilizer though, you know, for those rare Berries.
The slim figure was also very aware of the situation in this forest, so it didn't dare to linger at all. By taking advantage of the foul smell on its body, no other Pokémon dared to approach it, and it managed to escape this very dangerous forest area in one breath. Who knew smelling like a pile of garbage could be a life-saver? Probably a new survival tip for the Pokémon world.
The moonlight shone brightly, illuminating the earth and revealing the slim figure. It was only about 1.4 meters tall, covered in mud, and emaciated, but only its eyes, on its face, seemed extraordinarily bright.
"I survived..."
He wiped the mud from his face, revealing his young teen-boy but pale face. He smiled bitterly and somewhat helplessly, then said, "They all say if you transmigrate to an anime world, then the Pokémon world should be the first choice. There are pretty girls, cute pets, and you can even travel everywhere. So why, when I actually transmigrated to this world, am I so miserable, like a Rattata after getting trampled by a Rhydon?!" Yeah, tell me about it, kid. Some of us just get the short end of the stick. Like getting a Magikarp as your first Pokémon.
...
[End of Chapter]
This is a new translation book, you bastards! I hope everyone can vote and collect it. If not, I'll send a swarm of Hypno to give you nightmares! Don't be stingy, you cheapskates! And seriously, what the hell do you think happened to that Poké Ball? I bet it ended to catch for some random Pidgey.