[Tags: Harem · Comedy · Tang San Abuse · Yu Xiaogang Abuse · Shrek Abuse]
Yi Hong was an online novelist who occasionally live-streamed his writing to stay motivated.
So…
> "Why the hell did I transmigrate into Douluo... and my system is just a basic live-stream room?!"
> "And I got isekai'd with my body too!"
> "Reverse aging is fine, but being stuck at twelve years old? What is this, half-baked nonsense?!"
> "No soul power, no martial soul—what kind of joke is this?!"
He ranted for a full ten minutes, spewing complaints without repeating a word—classic novelist stamina.
Then suddenly, a line of text floated across the screen:
[User "God King of Destruction" has entered the live stream room]
God King?
Yi Hong instinctively put on his professional streamer smile—
> "Welcome, baby~ Thanks for dropping by! Don't forget to follow the stream, or you'll get lost~"
Wait a sec—
God King of Destruction?!
Isn't that the guy who rules divine punishment?!
And he, a transmigrated outsider, technically falls under this god's jurisdiction!
Don't panic!
Maybe it's just a high-quality impersonator?
Yi Hong opened the viewer list—nope, God King of Destruction was sitting there all by himself.
He clicked the avatar.
[God King of Destruction: Just had my proposal to expand the Divine Realm rejected by God King Tang San. Preparing to send an envoy to the mortal realm to kidnap Tang San's relatives and force him to agree.]
...Huh?
Yi Hong glanced at a nearby branch hall of the Spirit Hall.
Wasn't the Spirit Hall already wiped out by the time Tang San became a god?
Not the same timeline, then.
Crisis averted.
[God King of Destruction: A livestream from ten thousand years ago? What a curious rule—even I can't see through it.]
[God King of Destruction: Streamer, you're from Tang San's era, right? What'll it cost to eliminate him?]
Yi Hong blinked.
This Destruction God King gave off major moneybags energy with every word.
It would practically be a crime not to squeeze some gold coins out of him.
He'd skimmed the stream interface during his rant earlier, and immediately knew what to ask for.
> "Dear Destruction God King, I'm just a normal human right now—no soul power, no martial soul. I can't beat Tang San like this!"
He played the poor card hard—
> "But this stream has a tipping system. Big bro, you could sponsor me a God-Given Martial Soul and maybe throw in two God-Given Soul Rings."
> "Give me a bit of support, and I'll do my best to beat that little punk!"
The stream stayed quiet.
What's going on?
Was the price too high? Did he scare off the God King?
No way, right?
A couple of trinkets like that should be nothing to a deity.
He checked the viewer list again—God King of Destruction was still there.
Just as he was wondering...
A lightning-shaped scepter icon filled his entire screen.
[User "God King of Destruction" sent a gift: "God-Given Martial Soul · Scepter of Destruction" ×1]
> "HOLY—!"
Turns out the boss wasn't scared off—he was just topping up his balance!
> "Thank you to the mighty Destruction God King for the, uh—flying gift! I mean, for the God-Given Martial Soul!"
> "So generous, boss!"
> "Keep it coming! Two more God-Given Soul Rings, please!"
> "Otherwise, I've got a martial soul but no rings—still no match for that punk Tang San!"
And since there were no stream moderators here?
He could hustle the viewers for tips all he wanted—no bans, no warnings.
Perfect!
[User "God King of Destruction" sent a gift: "God-Given Soul Ring" ×2]
Boom! Just like that.
> "Thank you, boss, for the two God-Given Soul Rings!"
> "You're loaded, boss!"
> "Hang tight—I'll grab those gifts and go smack that punk down!"
[God King of Destruction: Hurry up. I'm busy.]
> "Got it!"
Yi Hong opened the stream backend like a pro—but there was no withdrawal tab. Instead, he saw a Live Stream Storage Room.
He clicked in.
All the gifts were there.
[Withdraw item: "God-Given Martial Soul · Scepter of Destruction" ×1?]
> "Yes, yes!"
A faint purple glow surrounded Yi Hong, converging in his right hand into a two-meter-long purple scepter shaped like lightning, radiating overwhelming destructive power.
The Scepter of Destruction!
A divine artifact from the God King of Destruction himself—even a sliver of its power was enough to crush any mortal martial soul.
He felt a rush of power surge through him.
Innate Soul Power: Level 20!
No time to waste—on with the soul rings!
[Withdraw item: "God-Given Soul Ring" ×2?]
> "Yes, yes!"
Two purple spheres appeared in his hands.
He injected soul power into them.
No acclimation time needed—they transformed instantly into two yellow soul rings and wrapped around the Scepter.
First Ring: 512 years. Soul Skill – Chain Lightning.
Second Ring: 821 years. Soul Skill – Ten-Thousand Thunder Prison.
Not bad at all.
Sure, he was twelve years old, but hey—modern folks are all in sub-health anyway.
No one exercises anymore.
Yi Hong was pretty pleased with himself.
But then—
[God King of Destruction: Tch. Century-level rings? That's not enough to beat Tang San's earlier self.]
[User "God King of Destruction" sent a gift: "Soul Ring Duration +2000 Years" ×2]
[God King of Destruction: Your soul power's too low to handle more. Make it quick—kill Tang San and there'll be more rewards.]
> "Hsss—thanks, boss, for the 2000-year ring boost!"
> "I'm on my way to gut that little punk!"
But Yi Hong didn't redeem the reward just yet.
First, he ran to the nearby Spirit Hall branch to register his martial soul and level.
After politely declining their recruitment, he picked up his monthly stipend as a two-ring Soul Grandmaster: 10 gold soul coins.
He hit a tavern for a full meal and gathered some basic info.
It was Spirit Calendar Year 2643, late May.
Tang San was 12 years old.
Perfect timing for the Advanced Soul Master Academy entrance exams.
So Tang San and Xiao Wu were probably on their way to Shrek Academy right now?
How convenient.
Yi Hong's city was located in Soto City.
He rented a carriage and made a beeline for Shrek.
Only then did he redeem the soul ring enhancement rewards.
The two yellow rings instantly turned into deep purple ones.
His body felt reinforced—he was bursting with energy.
From chronically weak to one punch, one kill—what a glow-up.
Life was good!
[User "God King of Destruction 002" has entered the live stream room]
> "Hey, another boss is here." Yi Hong whispered, "Tang San's level is 29. His ring ages are lower than mine, but he's got Tang Sect techniques and dual martial souls. Bit of a tough kill..."
[God King of Destruction 002: Livestream? Killing Tang San? Unacceptable!]
[God King of Destruction 002: After I and the Goddess of Life enter slumber, the Divine Realm will rely on God King Tang San to maintain order. He must remain safe!]
Yi Hong: "???"
Sir… are you suffering from split personality disorder?
Weren't you the one who placed the assassination order?!
[God King of Destruction 001: Who are you? Daring to call yourself the God King of Destruction?]
[God King of Destruction 002: You're the imposter! Think divine punishment is a joke?!]
Yi Hong blinked.
Wait a second—
God King of Destruction 001?
God King of Destruction 002?
Two Destruction God Kings?!
He checked the viewer list again—sure enough, two users.
He clicked on Destruction God King 002's profile.
[Destruction God King 002: After expanding, the outer barrier of the Douluo Divine Realm became dangerously thin, unable to withstand incoming temporal turbulence. Thus, the God of Destruction and the Goddess of Life plan to ignite their divine essence and merge with the realm to defend against the chaos.]
Well, well!
Two Destruction God Kings—one wants Tang San dead, the other says hands off.
Talk about an opportunity!
—After all, what streamers love most… is watching two whales fight.
And how do deities battle in a livestream?
With their wallets, of course!
Time to activate the universal streamer skill—Stir the pot!