"My name is Nara Shikadan, twelve years old, reserve ninja."
Nara Shikadan's ninja talent was... less than ideal.
But even so, he still managed to pass the graduation exam of the Konoha Ninja Academy.
"My family lives in the Kikyo Mountain and Kikyo Castle region in the northwest part of Konoha.
"Because the daily commute was too long and exhausting, I bought a top-floor corner apartment next to the academy. I only ride a deer home on weekends and holidays to visit my parents."
It's the 48th year of Konoha. The village is peaceful—for now.
But as the situation on the front lines grows increasingly tense, every ninja knows the truth: the Third Ninja World War is inevitable. All it needs is a single spark to ignite.
The Konoha leadership, sensing the brewing storm, not only urgently recalled powerful jōnin wandering outside the village, but also rushed through a wave of promotions—elevating many to jōnin through the Chūnin Exams and even graduating students from the Academy ahead of schedule.
And so, Nara Shikadan became a full-fledged ninja.
Putting aside reality for a moment: being a ninja—flying through the air, disappearing into shadows, looking cool—sounds pretty awesome.
Besides, today Nara Shikadan didn't just get a graduation certificate and a Konoha forehead protector. He also unlocked a long-overdue cheat.
[Ninja status officially acquired!]
[Lazy Ninja Goes to Heaven system activated!]
He had officially become a ninja—and awakened his golden finger out of nowhere.
Two good things in one day. It should've been the start of a dreamlike, joyful life.
So why did things turn out like this?
Shikadan stopped overthinking, paused, and continued listing off his credentials.
"I study hard, never skip class, and never leave early. After school, I go straight home. I never stay out all night. I go to bed at eleven and sleep exactly eight hours every night.
"Before bed, I take a dose of Nara clan secret medicine, then practice the Shadow Secret Technique for two and a half hours. I fall asleep the moment I hit the pillow, and I never carry fatigue into the next day.
"My father—a doctor and director of the Nara Pharmaceutical Research Institute—says I'm too obsessed with the Yin Release secret techniques passed down by our family. While I'm far ahead of my peers in terms of progress, it's already taken a toll on my physical health.
"If this continues, it could seriously impact my future as a ninja."
Until now, Nara Shikadan had remained perfectly calm.
His ninja talents might be less than ideal—but far from hopeless.
On the contrary, thanks to his powerful "innate" spiritual energy, and the signature high-level intellect of the Nara clan, Shikadan possessed excellent aptitude in learning, chakra extraction, and chakra control.
Even if he didn't want to be a ninja, Nara Shikadan had other options.
He could apply his talents to a scientific research career in the shinobi world. The "scientific answers" he knew—truths that touched the very foundation of reality—weren't just one or two...
The path of the great ninja scientist had already been paved by countless predecessors.
At worst, Shikadan could just inherit the family business: the Nara Pharmaceutical Research Institute, hundreds of Nara deer, dozens of Nara-run pharmacies, and several small mountains.
His father had been shouting about retiring for the past thirteen years!
But damn it...
If not for a genuine love of it, who in their right mind would choose to become a ninja? (Seriously.)
Besides, Nara Shikadan had already come up with a way to resolve his dilemma. As long as he could complete that technique, as long as he could—
"Hey, kid. What the hell are you talking about?"
A voice interrupted Shikadan's train of thought. He sighed silently and looked across at the kunoichi before him.
She had a delicate, fair face, soft golden hair tied in a single ponytail, and sharply defined eyes beneath thin, graceful eyebrows.
She wore a milky-white, midriff-baring short-sleeved top. Her waist was toned and supple, faint lines of abdominal muscle visible. Black ultra-short shorts showed off long, smooth, well-proportioned legs. Her entire posture exuded strength and confidence.
But the most eye-catching thing?
The generous curves outlined by that tight top.
There wasn't a single ninja in Konoha who didn't recognize this rich and powerful blonde beauty.
Granddaughter of the First and Second Hokage. Disciple of the Third. One of the legendary Sannin—
Tsunade stood with arms crossed, staring at the black-haired boy with a frosty expression.
Had she not seen it with her own eyes, she wouldn't have believed it—a kid this young and fresh-faced showing a dopey smile like he was bathing in some dreamy satisfaction the moment she passed by.
Just like that perverted, white-haired teammate of hers who loved to peep at the women's baths—wait a second!
With the village under rising pressure, even a clown like Jiraiya should've come back by now, right?
Suddenly, as if she remembered something, Tsunade's cold expression disappeared. In its place came a mischievous smirk that hovered between amusement and suspicion.
Nara Shikadan didn't understand this "legendary fat sheep's" strange reaction, so he simply kept answering her question.
"I mean... I've always pursued a peaceful life."
In a world where bloodlines and fate rule all...
Above ordinary mortals stands the hard-working genius.
Above the hard-working genius is the prodigy.
Above the prodigy? The cheater.
And beyond even that: masterminds, rabbit goddesses, and literal gods handing out cheats!
Ordinary ninjas have limits.
Even the Nara clan has limits.
In a world where gods walk the earth and life is cheap—
Nara Shikadan just wants to be a chill ninja, make a little money, and live a peaceful life.
A well-cooked bowl of chicken soup is enough.
The First was Senju. The Second was Uchiha. I'm from the Nara clan. We all have bright futures.
"Ninja," "genius," "reincarnation," "cheats"—Nara Shikadan has all the keywords! He's well on his way to a bright tomorrow!
"A peaceful life? Don't be ridiculous. I've figured out your true identity!"
Tsunade's smirk bloomed like a peony. The joy of "reuniting with an old friend" lit up her expression. She stepped forward, her motion causing a dangerously hypnotic sway. One pink fist rose high, and a shockwave pulsed around her.
"This is the Hidden Leaf Village—not some place for you to mess around!"
Those massive, bouncing curves filled his field of view. Nara Shikadan's pupils shrank. Two slim shadows snaked out from beneath him like silent hunters.
[C-Rank Secret Technique: Shadow Gathering Jutsu]
Description: Under the user's will, shadow tentacles slither through darkness.
Effect: Transforms the user's shadow into countless fine tendrils to manipulate physical objects nearby. Highly versatile.
Rating: A kunoichi's best friend.
Nara Shikadan didn't cast it to attack—only to de-escalate.
"This is my forehead protector!"
With precise control, Shikadan's shadow lifted his forehead protector and graduation certificate from his tool pouch, presenting them between himself and Tsunade's incoming fist.
"And here's the diploma!"
Instant, seal-less jutsu? That's definitely the Nara clan's shadow secret techniques!
Tsunade stared at the documents and the writhing shadow tendrils holding them. Her expression shifted from suspicion to surprise.
So he wasn't lying? He's really not that pervert Jiraiya in disguise?
Her killing intent lessened. The fist she'd just readied began to lower.
Shikadan, sensing her restraint, exhaled in relief. A cold sweat slicked his forehead.
If she'd actually punched him, his small frame would've been sent straight to heaven!
Shikadan genuinely had no idea how he'd offended her. They'd never even interacted before.
He was just trying to inspect his newly awakened cheat system, and then—bam—this golden-haired sheep stopped him cold!
Do blonde fat sheep really run this world?!
Seeing Tsunade still hesitant, Shikadan decided to play his final trump card.
"If I did offend you..."
He put the documents back in his pouch and fished out several crisp 10,000-ryō bills, which he offered with both hands.
"Please forgive me."
You little brat—trying to bribe me with money?! What kind of insult—
But then...
Shikadan gently flicked his thumb. The stack of bills fanned out like a peacock's tail, flashing the dazzling light of wealth.
Limited Skill: Gold Release – Hundred-Thousand Ryō Hand!
Too much. It was simply too much.
"Ahem."
Tsunade coughed into her hand and tried to look serious.
"Kid from the Nara clan... You said you live in Kikyo Castle, right? That's outside the village. It's late, and it's not safe beyond the walls. I'll escort you back."
With Tsunade turning to lead the way, a gleam in her eye and 100,000 ryō somehow vanishing into her possession, Shikadan swallowed his objections.
As they walked, he took a deep breath, pushed aside all distractions, and called out in his heart:
『Lazy Ninja Goes to Heaven』
A translucent panel only he could see appeared before his eyes, glowing faintly.
He'd awakened this "lazy ghost system" the moment he received his forehead protector—but hadn't had time to investigate it in detail.
Then came the golden-haired sheep who used beauty as a weapon...
An utter humiliation!
Shikadan glanced at Tsunade's back, then checked his system messages.
[Detected: Host is afflicted by "Six Paths Sage Art: Self-Inflicted Curse Sealing Technique!"]
[Lazy ninja—destined to ascend!]
'What kind of ominous messages are these…?'
'And Six Paths Sage Art? In this era—before the Third Ninja World War even begins—the only person who can perform that is the old geezer lounging in the Pure Land!'
'What is this nonsense?'
'Everyone else gets cheats they can use freely, and I get stuck with a cursed one?!'
'Old man, you planted something worse than frog piss in my body—I'll remember this!'
Shikadan forced himself to calm down and opened his personal attribute page.
You planted this immortal spell that's even more despicable than frog piss into my body?! Old man, I'll remember this!
Nara Shikadan took a deep breath, then opened his personal attribute information panel.
Name: Nara Shikadan
(Can view his own meridian system model)
Ninjutsu: C
(Mastery of techniques based on chakra and other energy forms)
Taijutsu: E-
(Mastery of martial arts techniques based on physical prowess)
Strength: E-
(Raw physical power—affects arm, leg, and grip strength)
Speed: E-
(Physical agility and reaction time—affects movement and reflexes)
Stamina: E-
(Vital constitution and cellular activity—can be roughly understood as physical vitality)
Wisdom: C-
(Thinking ability, knowledge, experience—can be roughly understood as spiritual energy)
Technique Ability:
[Clone Technique] (E-Rank)
[Transformation Technique] (E-Rank)
[Substitution Technique] (E-Rank)
[Shadow Binding Technique] (Secret, D-Rank)
[Shadow Gathering Technique] (Secret, C-Rank)
[Shadow Seaming Technique] (Secret, B-Rank)
Ninja Secret Scroll: Blank
Overall Evaluation: D-Rank (Genin)
Each of the six ninja stats came with its own detailed explanation. The interface looked professional and intuitive—nothing too hard to understand.
By focusing on a particular stat, he could view its exact numerical value.
After running a few tests, Shikadan had determined the following values:
Ninjutsu: 4
Taijutsu: 2
Strength: 2
Speed: 3
Stamina: 2
Wisdom: 4
Aside from [Ninjutsu] and [Wisdom]—which reflected his mastery of techniques and spiritual power respectively—every other stat could only be described with one phrase:
A bright future ahead.
'No need to dwell on the panel's benefits. I just haven't figured out how to improve the raw attribute values yet. For now, research into the six basic stats can wait. As for the remaining three items...'
[Technical Ability] records individual skills and jutsu.
[Overall Evaluation] summarizes total combat ability.
'Those two are easy to grasp. The middle one, though—[Ninja Secret Scroll]—that's the one that really piques my curiosity…'
Shikadan hadn't had the system for long. Many of its functions still needed exploration and testing.
Even so, one feature of [Lazy Ninja Goes to Heaven] had already proven highly useful.
At his mental command, the virtual interface shimmered, and a soft ripple of light swept across it. The six numeric stats gathered into a rotating hexagonal radar chart, and beside it appeared a miniature model of the human body.
If one looked closely, they would see an intricate chakra circulatory system drawn across the figure—dense, branching channels, with all 361 chakra acupoints clearly marked.
Nara Shikadan's eyes lit up with joy.
'Hinata—wait, no!'
'This is on par with the Ōtsutsuki clan's Byakugan!'