Jake barely remembered falling asleep the night before. The exhaustion hadn't felt like rest,it was more like surrender, like his body had finally collapsed under the weight of too many feelings he didn't know how to hold. When he opened his eyes the next morning, the dread returned instantly. He reached for his phone without thinking, the screen lighting up far too bright for how dim he felt inside. No reply from Jules. His apology sat there in the message thread, small and exposed, like a vulnerable part of himself he wished he could take back or say better. Still nothing. Jake dropped the phone onto the bed beside him and stared up at the ceiling. The silence was louder than it had been yesterday. It didn't scream anymore, it whispered. It asked questions he didn't want to answer. Had he lost Jules completely? Had he ruined it beyond repair? And then there was Emily. Her face, her voice, her sudden withdrawal,it all replayed like background noise he couldn't turn off. He didn't blame her. He wouldn't have wanted to deal with someone like himself either. He sat up slowly, pulling the duvet tighter around his body, like a shield. Then, without overthinking it, he grabbed his phone again and opened a new message:
Hey. I'm sorry about yesterday. I was going through something, but that's no excuse for how I treated you. Can we talk? He hesitated and then hit send. It wasn't much, but it was honest and maybe that was the first step. The rest of the morning crawled. Jake tried to distract himself with work, emails, coffee, anything,but it all felt distant. His mind kept circling back to Jules, to Emily, to himself. By the time his lunch break rolled around, he felt hollow again. But as he stepped back into the building, his phone buzzed in his pocket.
Emily.
Sure, Jake. Let's talk after work.
He stopped in his tracks. Relief surged through his chest like fresh air after being underwater. She wasn't gone. Not yet. The rest of the afternoon passed in a quiet hum of tension. Jake didn't know what he would say. He only knew he had to show up. At five, Emily was waiting by the door. Her smile was small, cautious. Jake offered one back, just as hesitant. They walked in silence to a small coffee shop a few blocks away, the kind of place with worn booths and chipped mugs and soft music that made it easier to say difficult things. After they ordered, Jake took a breath. "I'm sorry," he said. "I… sometimes I get overwhelmed, and I don't know what to do with it. But I shouldn't have taken it out on you." Emily studied him for a moment. Then she nodded.
"I appreciate you saying that. I just… wish you would let people in, Jake. You don't have to carry it all alone." Jake looked down. "I do trust you. It's just... hard. I'm scared. I always think if I show too much, people will leave."
"You're not too much," she said softly. "You just don't believe that yet." Jake swallowed hard. Her words reached somewhere deep in him. A part that still believed he had to earn affection by being less.....less needy, less intense, less himself. That night, alone in bed, Jake's thoughts drifted to Jules. He couldn't keep avoiding the mess. He wanted to try. He wanted to fight for it. Even if he was terrified. He picked up his phone and made the call. "Hey, Jake," Jules answered. His voice was cautious. Jake's own voice cracked. "I'm sorry. I know I'm not easy. But I'm trying. I just… I get scared. That if I mess up, you'll leave." There was a pause. Jake held his breath. Finally, Jules replied. "It's hard. But I don't want to lose you either." Jake shut his eyes, the relief washing over him like warmth. "I want to get better," he whispered. "I don't want to keep repeating this." "I know," Jules said. "And I'll be here. Just… let me in, okay?" The call ended not with certainty, but with something quieter and understanding. And for Jake, that was enough. Just enough to believe that maybe, this time, something real could grow from all the chaos.