The girl on my doorstep didn't knock. She posed.
Arms out, chin lifted, golden twintails fluttering in the wind that didn't exist. She sparkled like she paid a subscription for dramatic lighting.
"I am Princess Liora von Lunaris, first of her name, heiress of the Golden Moon Dynasty, and suitor #128 in the Grand Harem Trials."
I blinked. "Grand what now?"
Without asking, she stepped inside. My door opened for her on its own. I didn't even know it could do that.
Haruka, Lucina, Nanami, and Sakura were already waiting in the living room like judgmental dragons.
Lucina sipped tea with an evil glint. "Another competitor, I see."
Sakura crouched by the window, kunai already drawn. "Want me to throw her back out?"
Nanami looked her up and down. "Royalty confirmed. Estimated threat level: diva."
Haruka's eye twitched. "Why do they keep coming to our house?"
Liora scanned the room, unimpressed. "Oh? So these are the peasants clinging to my fiancé."
"Fiancé?!" the harem yelled in unison.
"I don't remember proposing to anyone!" I shouted.
Liora tossed me a scroll. "Our marriage was arranged two worlds ago. You're mine now. Kindly step aside, low-budget waifus."
💥 SYSTEM CRISIS DETECTED
❗Harem Riot Imminent
Emergency Objective: Prevent Girlfriend World War
Timer: [00:03:00]
Penalty: Death by Catfight
"I OBJECT!" Haruka snapped. "You can't just walk in here with your royal power levels and claim him!"
Lucina stood. "Try it, princess. I've bathed in the blood of better claims."
Nanami calmly began uploading everyone's embarrassing search history to the cloud. "Try me."
Sakura crouched lower. "I have bombs."
"EVERYONE PLEASE SIT DOWN," I screamed, waving a frying pan like a priest at an exorcism.
Liora simply smirked. "You poor, unstable man. You need a strong wife to manage these… accessories."
"THEY'RE NOT ACCESSORIES, THEY'RE ARMED!"
💬 [System Emergency Protocol Activated]
"Deploying Chaos Management Subroutine…"
My front door exploded. Again.
From the smoke emerged my homeroom teacher, Miss Akiyama, looking like she'd walked out of a romantic warzone.
She held a clipboard. "Hiro Kaze, I am begging you to come back to school. The hallways are unsafe. Students are wearing your face on their bags. Someone graffitied 'Harem King' on the school statue."
Lucina perked up. "Really? I thought I hired that guy in secret."
Akiyama sighed. "The school board has officially added 'Harem Politics' as a new extracurricular. You've broken the educational system."
📢 [System Alert: Popularity Contest Day 1 Begins Now]
We arrived at school to find the gates lined with Hiro fans. Girls waving banners. Boys holding signs. Someone had printed out a 10-meter banner that said:
"100 Hearts, 1 Man, 0 Peace."
The school courtyard had been divided into "Hiro Zones" — each run by a different girlfriend faction.
Zone A: Haruka's "Pure Love Club"
Zone B: Lucina's "Blood Pact Alliance"
Zone C: Nanami's "Digital Wife Faction"
Zone D: Sakura's "Silent Love Assassins"
Zone E: Liora's "Royal Court of Ultimate Marriage"
I stood in the middle like a man about to be publicly drawn and quartered.
Then Kuro Renji arrived — stepping out of a rose-decorated limo — and blew a kiss to a crowd of screaming fans.
"Ready to lose, commoner?" he asked, adjusting his glitter-trimmed gloves.
I smiled weakly. "I haven't even won control of my shower schedule."
💥 New Challenge:
Day 1 Task – Win Over the Faculty
Objective: Deliver a school-wide speech and survive the aftermath
Penalty: Lose 15 reputation points + get replaced by a cardboard cutout of Kuro
I was shoved onto the stage by my girlfriends before I could escape. A microphone was pushed into my hand.
Students and teachers watched me. Kuro smirked. Liora winked. Sakura had already climbed the roof for a tactical view.
I cleared my throat.
"My fellow students… I have no idea how any of this happened. I just wanted ramen. But now I have four girlfriends, a princess, and an AI who tracks my heartbeat."
Nanami gave a thumbs-up from the front row.
"I don't know what love means anymore. I don't know what peace is. But I do know this—"
I looked at the crowd.
"PLEASE STOP SHIPPING ME WITH THE JANITOR. HE'S A NICE GUY BUT I'M NOT INTO MOPS."
The crowd burst into cheers.
Kuro dropped his rose.
Lucina clapped with a wicked grin. "He's learning."
✅ Task Complete
Reputation: +15
Title Unlocked: "Reluctant Public Speaker"
Day 1 Winner: Hiro Kaze
Current Rank: #8
As I left the stage, the system pinged again.
💘 New Confession Detected…
Girl #006: Infiltrating from Rival Harem…
I groaned.
"Another one?!"
One girlfriend closer to madness…